Internet Dating

Attention all freaks, stop instant messaging me!

So I've decided to try internet dating... ya I know. I went on a site for fat girls cause.. I'm a fat girl. RIGHT away you get bombarded with instant messages from guys. Lots of guys from other countries and from the US. Now I like to chat with new and interesting people as much as the next girl, but CMON!

Now when I started on this site, there were some girls chatting on one of the forums about guys who would message them and they'd just ignore them. Now I thought this was rude at the time, so I said as much to the girls. I got the response that I was new here and I'd feel differently as time went on. I shrugged it off and moved on.

I filled out my profile. Posted a picture of myself and went to read some forums. I started getting messages right away. Weird messages from men all over the world asking me shit there's no way they would ask some chick on the street.

I was like ok I need to make myself clearer in my profile. So I go back to my profile and add some stuff. I put that I am looking for friends, people that live near me that share the experience of being large and can sympathize. Messages kept coming, less of them but still creepy.

So ok I go back to my profile and change it AGAIN! I put, I am not looking for an internet relationship, I'm not looking for a long distance relationship and I'm not looking for a sexual relationship. I also list that all polite messages will be responded to.

There that should do it right? WRONG!

I get messages from some dude in Italy. I politely remind him that in my profile it states PLAINLY that I am not interested in a man so far away. He tells me he's moving to California (where the tutu(me) resides). I was like ok well I don't want to be rude but this guy is not getting the 2 ton lead hint.

More often than not I get guys that want to know how fat I am... ya they LITERALLY ask me! Some ask about your boobies, your tummy or your ass. Occasionally I get a nice guy but it's rare. I think some guys just think you're lucky they're paying attention to you.

I'm like flypaper for freaks!

Alright I knoooow I've been slack about blogging and it's a typical excuse for me to say the holidays have interfered but for realsies they HAVE.

I seriously love my family. My dad is the second youngest of NINE (ya fuck that) kids. So ya we have a large family (pun intended). Most of us are fat, loud, and happy. So Dad, my cousin Joe, and I are in the garage talking about political issues and we're all yelling at each other and telling each other how we're all wrong. I mean it's hilarious in there, we were joined later by my sister in law Denise and Mom who entered the garage looking apprehensive, and who can blame them there's three grown people in there yelling at each other. Incidentally, in case you were wondering, we were all saying basically the same thing... but it's fun to yell at one another.

My point is, we give each other a LOT of shit. I call my dad Captain Donut, my brother gives me shit about the hair dye spreading to my brain and making me stupid, we all call each other out on our weight, I tell my mom at the store come on old lady lets move it. When people over hear us I'm sure it sounds hateful or mean but it's not. It's just the way our family interacts with each other.

Happy Turkey Day!

Happy Thanksgiving to all of my American friends and Happy Thursday to all the lovelies in other countries :)

Not Funny

I'm a gamer.. I know... girls don't play video games. Now that we have that out of the way. I was on a game I play last night it's a text based MUD (multi user dungeon) and we were all talking about how you should always assume the chick you're talking to is a middle aged fat bald man.. I let the fat part slide, big of me I know.

One of the ladies that plays on the game said she was on facebook and that almost everyone in the game has seen her. The jerk she was talking to said he had never seen her and so she posted the url for her facebook and he went and looked at it. Upon returning to the conversation he says 'What an ugly kid'. She was understandably upset and he said basically that he was joking..

Hey, dude, being an asshole isn't funny.. I'm all for chilling out and not taking shit seriously but come on, don't insult someone's kids.. I mean really if you can't say something nice about someone just shut the fuck up.. it's one thing to go off if your opinion was solicited I mean then the parent has asked your opinion. But for real telling someone their child is ugly is unnecessary, it really is. It's not like she was going on and on about her kid, and for the record her baby is fucking adorable.

Why do we treat each other like shit? Does it make you feel better when you've made someone else sad? What kind of fucked up person gets off on making others feel like shit? How hard is it to be like hey nice shirt? When I compliment someone and it makes them happy it makes ME feel good.

What Do You Mean I'm Fat?

So I suppose I should explain my blog name. I have a picture up there at the top, see it? I'm fat.

I've been aware of my fatness for a very long time, since maybe I was five. So, I'm sure there are SOME fat people in denial, you know those people who don't think they're fat and that's cool, it's a free country, you do your thing girl! (or boy!) But at 350 lbs I've already got the slight notion that I perhaps, maybe, possibly, COULD BE ...fat.

So I just loooooooooooooove it when some dumbass drives by or walks by and says I'm fat. I was at a bus stop with my daughter, Michele, and some douchebag drives by and yells YOU'RE FAT! I looked at Michele and said. MICHELE, I'M FAT?? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ?!?! Then we laughed and got on the bus and went to lunch. I'm fat? No shit Sherlock. I KNOW I'm fat.

What's WORSE is doctors. I went to Western Bariatric to have a consultation on gastric bypass surgery. This is a place where fat people go right? Like no skinny chicks roll up into there and are like OK I NEED YOUR HELP!

So I'm in the waiting room with my now exhusband. I'm not even the biggest person there. So I go into the exam room to talk to the surgeon and he talks to me about stuff like my diabetes will probably go away and my blood pressure will go down .. exciting stuff! Then I lay down , and he examines my tummy, and I kid you not he says to me... You're a big girl. People always ask me what did I say to him in reply. I said.. nothing. I was BLINDSIDED. You don't expect the Bariatric people to call you fat.. they're supposed to help you WTF? In hindsight I should have been like.. Oh I want a second opinion...

Anyway I hate that shit.. knock it off

AAAAAHHHH

You know what REALLY bugs me? RUDENESS! If you're standing in the middle of the isle at the grocery store, if you're talking on your cell in line and holding people up, if you cut someone off because you're in a hurry, if you play your music so loud I can hear it in my car over my music with the windows SHUT then I'm talkin to YOU.

How much brain power does it take to consider there are people around you? I can't believe the way some humans TREAT each other. I'm more and more disgusted by the lack of please and thank you's too.

Parents it's not ok for your child to not know when to say please and thank you. It's not FUNNY when they push other kids out of the way to get in line. It's not ok for them to disrespect people they don't know. My kids aren't perfect BY ANY MEANS but they know how to say please and thank you and they know if you bump in to someone you say EXCUSE ME.

The grocery store is one of the worst places. If someone is looking at something and you stop in front of them all you have to do is say pardon me. If you bump into someone say excuse me, if you reach an intersection of isles with someone else would it KILL you to let them go first? What happened to just being nice because it's the right thing to do? And hey, if you screw up here's a novel approach.. APOLOGIZE!

Even if you don't believe in God or Alah or Billyjimbob the Monster Truck deity or WHATEVER! Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, is a good thing to live by. It means treat others how you would like them to treat YOU. Not treat them as they've treated you.

Now I love you guys go be nice to each other.

Teach Your Children

Alrighty so, I'm kind of a slow burn, I have a long fuse, seriously it takes a looooong time for me to get angry. UNLESS! We're talking about children. I had an argument with a friend yesterday about public education. Now, I am WELL aware that the public education system in the United States is flawed, it is. HOWEVER, it's better to have the flawed system we have now then to have NOTHING. My friend argued that the government should have no say so in how you educate your children, which, in a perfect world, that's a SUPER idea. There are parents who know their kids need an education and would do their best to make sure their offspring are ready for the real world. These parents are not what the mandatory attendance of school laws are for. There are parents who don't give a fuck, they had babies for whatever reason, as is their right, and are doing the bare minimum required by law (sometimes not even that) to keep their children alive and safe. What would happen if we had masses of uneducated 18 year old's voting? I suppose you could take away their right to vote? Ooops no can't do that, nor would I want to. Millions of men and women have died over the years so we have the right to vote. In a world where even a college degree doesn't guarantee you a job, I think denying our young the opportunity for an education is setting them up to remain poor.